Hmmm... Where has the time gone???

Well, here I am....obviously not on time...The last time I blogged was in November of  2007. Sooo much has changed since then! Isn't it bizarre how things can change so much in a little over a year? In the midst of all of this, I have lost 2 jobs that were very steady employment for me, made the transition to free-lance vocalist, started working on my album, etc. It has definitely been a faith defining moment for me and Ryan in the sense that I have been blessed and fortunate to not have had to really stretch in the area of work for the last few years. But, God......I love those two words. "But, God..." It's like the divine hiccup in a sentence where all hope seems to be lost and then, "But, God..." Like in the movies where a major disaster is about to occur and Superman shows up. But, God has been faithful through it all and shown up BIG time. He has more than taken care of us, in ways we never thought were possible.  Yes, we have experienced "the money coming in at the very last second" more than once this year. But that is not the only way God has shown up. He has answered prayer miraculously. He has answered prayer to our disappointment as well, seemingly tagging the answer with, "do you trust me?" And those moments have been defining, too....but it doesn't mean we didn't allow Him to work on us without kicking and screaming MANY times. 

My dog, Brutus is a feisty, incorrigible, yet cute as can be, yorkie. He has some...um....ahem...habits that after 4 years, he still needs work on. Every morning as I get him "all leashed up" to take him on a walk, he gets overly excited. In fact, he gets in full on alpha dog mode and starts to fight me because he know what is about to take place. You see, I am about to take him on his morning walk that he loves so much. But, before we take off, he starts to bite the leash, growl and squirm like a rabid dog. He puts the leash in his mouth and is so focused on trying to get the reigns away from me, that he forgets that I am just trying to take him on the walk he so desperately wants to go on. If I had video capability, I would show you this. All he wants is this walk. All I want is to take him on one. But the fight that ensues for who is in control makes the whole thing take longer and more frustrating. Sometimes, I literally say to my dog out loud...."Geez! if you would just stop getting bent out of shape and start letting me do this, you'll realize I'm taking you where you want to go!!!" One morning recently as we were doing our daily alpha dog duel, I said those words out loud and literally heard God saying them to me. "Jen....you're so worked up over this that you're not focusing on the fact that I am getting you there. I'm taking you where you want to go....Just because it doesn't look like what you thought it would be at first, doesn't mean that I'm not working things all together for your good. I'm taking you on this amazing journey of your dreams, it's just I'm leading the way...and you're not. Just....trust me...." Wow.....All this time, fighting the reigns...kicking and screaming....battling it out for my way or the highway.... I felt such comfort and almost an "A-ha!" moment. He wants to take me to my promised land, to the place I want to go. It just may not look like the way I IMAGINED it....it just looks the way HE IMAGINED it....

"Now to Him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine....." Ephesians 3:20